CircleBumpCheckedFilledMedicalBookmarkBookmarkTickBookmarkAddCheckBoxCheckBoxFilled

Why Social Media Gave Me Mother’s Day Envy

With Mother's Day photos plastered all over Facebook, it’s hard not to compare your day with theirs. Here's one mom's tips on how to deal.
save article
profile picture of Abigail Green
Updated May 11, 2017
mother at home looking at phone upset
Image: iStock

Did you all have a happy Mother’s Day? Mine was pretty good: pancakes and handmade cards and sticky hugs, followed by all the usual sibling squabbles, house-trashing and running out of milk and patience. Life with little ones isn’t exactly a day at the spa, you know? But I didn’t think much of it…until I went on Facebook.

As I clicked through update after update about breakfast in bed, bouquets of roses, mimosas, picnics and doting families, I started to feel worse and worse. My husband’s homemade pancakes paled in comparison to brunch at a fancy restaurant. (Partly because we were out of maple syrup…again.) And why were her kids smiling and wearing matching outfits while mine wouldn’t even agree to be photographed together? How did she get away with leaving the kids at home to spend a whole weekend with girlfriends when my husband couldn’t even grasp the concept of letting me sleep in? (Hint for dads: You have to close the bedroom door when you get up and lock the kids out! Otherwise, they’re dive-bombing us in our beds the minute your back is turned.)

This Facebook-induced angst is a real thing, something many moms I know suffer from. Here’s my two cents on what to do when social media posts start harshing your Mother’s Day vibe. Remember:

• What you see is not the whole story. Most people use social media to portray a carefully chosen image of their lives. You’re seeing the highlights, not the blooper reel. Maybe that adorable color-coordinated family photo was preceded by tantrums and threats. Maybe that mom made brunch reservations herself rather than rely on her husband to read her mind. (Hmmm… now there’s a thought.)

Related Video

• Sometimes people have an agenda. I wonder about those couples who post flowery love notes to each other in public forums. Are they really that happy and perfect, or are they trying to prove something? I can’t help but think of a couple I knew like that…who are now divorced.

• “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” Good point, Eleanor Roosevelt. Did looking at other people’s supposedly fun, fabulous Mother’s Days have to make me feel worse about mine? Did I need to compare their lives to my own? Did I need to be on Facebook at all when I had a rare day at home with my whole family and (supposedly) didn’t have to do any housework? No, I did not. I could close my laptop, cuddle up with my imperfect, non-color-coordinated children, and enjoy the moment for what it is. And then give myself a break for getting irritated when the moment passed and they asked me what was for dinner. (Asked ME. On Mother’s Day!)

So that’s exactly what I did. We ordered in, by the way. And I left the dishes for my husband. Maybe I should thank him on Facebook.

save article
ADVERTISEMENT

Next on Your Reading List

Big Sister Gift Hero
23 Big Sister Gifts to Celebrate Her New Status
By Cassie Kreitner
dad and daughter drawing at home
How Dads Can Help Boost Their Child’s Early Educational Success
By Wyndi Kappes
US actor Josh Duhamel (L) and his wife US model Audra Mari pose during a photocall for the Golden Nymph Awards ceremony of the 62nd Monte-Carlo Television Festival in the principalty of Monaco on June 20, 2023
Josh Duhamel’s Son Axl Has Adorable Reaction to New Big Brother Role
By Wyndi Kappes
ADVERTISEMENT
ms rachel stands up to body shamer
Ms. Rachel Stands Up to Body Shamers in New Video
By Wyndi Kappes
happy family walking in city
These Top 15 Family-Friendly Cities Offer Amazing Outdoor Spaces
By Wyndi Kappes
family-halloween-costumes-HERO
Spooktacular Family Halloween Costumes
By Martina Garvey
daddy daughter target date
Adorable Daddy/Daughter Date at Target Melts Hearts in Viral TikTok
By Wyndi Kappes
ADVERTISEMENT
parents on laptop and phone while sitting in bed at home
Parenting Trends: Are You a Bedroom or Living Room Parent?
By Wyndi Kappes
mother and father cuddling newborn baby in hospital bed after labor and delivery
36 Amazing Push Present Ideas to Make a New Mom Feel Loved
By Cassie Kreitner
tia mowry and children
Tia Mowry Gives the Pep Talk All Moms Need to Hear
By Wyndi Kappes
ADVERTISEMENT
gifts-for-pregnant-friend-HERO
27 Gifts for Pregnant Women That Are Cute and Congratulatory
By Caroline Dweck
Ashley Graham Jokes About Summer Zoo Visit and Talks Mom Guilt
Ashley Graham Jokes About Summer Zoo Visit and Talks Mom Guilt
By Wyndi Kappes
bluey tv show taking a break after season 3
Bluey Is Going on a Break: Writers Plan Hiatus After Season Three
By Wyndi Kappes
ADVERTISEMENT
gerber baby 2023 maddie mendoza
Meet 2023 Gerber Baby and Chief Growing Officer Madison Mendoza
By Wyndi Kappes
Mike The Situation and Lauren Sorrentino
Mike and Lauren Sorrentino on Their Parenting Situation
By Lauren Barth
broadway husbands Bret Shuford and Stephen Hanna kissing their baby son
The Broadway Husbands Talk Surrogacy and Dad Life
By Lauren Barth
Priyanka Chopra and her husband musician Nick Jonas pose for pictures during the inauguration of the Cultural Centre (NMACC) at the Jio World Centre (JWC) in Mumbai on March 31, 2023
Why Nick Jonas Plans to Celebrate His Wife on Father's Day
By Wyndi Kappes
ADVERTISEMENT
two gay dads having fun with their daughter outside during the summer time
What Parenting With Pride Means to 14 LGBTQ+ Parents
By Lauren Barth
New Sibling Gift Ideas-hero
The 30 Sweetest Gifts for Siblings From Baby
By Martina Garvey
Last Minute Fathers Day Gifts-hero
33 Last-Minute Father's Day Gifts That’ll Arrive Right on Time
By Martina Garvey
ADVERTISEMENT
Article removed.
Article removed.
Name added. View Your List