profile picture of Anisa Arsenault
Anisa Arsenault
Associate Editor

Dad Sparks Debate for Supporting Wife's Co-sleeping

This wasn't even close to his intention.
PUBLISHED ON 04/04/2017

One dad is catching flack for sharing an intimate glimpse of what parenthood looks like for his family. And all he was trying to do was give his wife some credit.

David Brinkley snapped a candid photo of his wife, Alora, napping in their bed with their two children, sharing the image and a sweet message on Facebook.

“Do I have to squeeze into a small corner of the bed sometimes? Yeah. But my God, how beautiful does she look holding my children? Making them feel loved and safe?” he writes. “I just want to say that I am proud of the decisions my wife makes as a mom and I support every single one of them. I would never want to rob her of this time she has or these seasons that are in reality too short to not enjoy. Please respect your wives as mothers."

The post made its way to the Love What Matters Facebook page, and soon enough, co-sleeping critiques began.

To be clear, the American Academy of Pediatrics advises against co-sleeping, defined as bed sharing. Sleep-related deaths claim 3,500 infant lives each year in the US, partially because of suffocation risks linked to co-sleeping. Still, the AAP recognizes that many parents will fall asleep with baby, whether intentional or not. And while the organization won’t yet approve or disapprove of them, there are several products out there created to make co-sleeping safer.

The thing is, this post was never intended to be about co-sleeping. Alora set the record straight in a followup Facebook post.

“My husband made an amazing post that was just meant to be a sweet sentiment and bless his heart he knows nothing about a privacy setting,” she begins. “This was a special nap time experience—I laid down to nurse my daughter and my 2-year-old son came in to snuggle with his baby sister. My husband supervised this entire experience and made it possible for me to comfortably lay with them both like this as he very lovingly and carefully watched over us. We would never put our children in a dangerous situation and our night time sleeping looks completely different than this. As far as co-sleeping goes, that was not the point of my husband’s post.”

Likely aware of how ridiculous it is that she had to go on the defense about this, Alora leaves parents with this message:

“We are all aware that the list of things we can NOT do as parents is much longer than the list of things we CAN do. We are probably never going to do it all right but we do the best we can and go with our heart.”