Photo of Family Out to Eat Captures How Isolating Motherhood Can Feel

A mother is always on call, and it can be draining—mentally, physically and emotionally.

Brandy Ferner, of the blog Adult Conversation, captured a moment lots of moms know all too well. While she was out to eat, she spotted another family celebrating together. Tucked away in the corner and separated from the rest of the party was a mom who was trying to soothe her child. The moment struck a chord with Ferner, who shared her observation for the day on Facebook.

“I’m not trying to put this specific family on blast, but I am trying to shine a light on these little moments of motherhood that can add up to feeling isolated and resentful, and this one captures it perfectly,” she says.

Ferner’s heart went out to the mom, who had to take a step back from adult conversations and cocktails to entertain her little one. “I vividly remember this stage, and I remember writing in a journal that I never wanted to forget how isolating it felt at dinners and parties.”

“This image, with the mom in pink on the left with her baby touching a balloon is an accurate visual of the constant, unseen care-taking of motherhood many moms do that leave us out of the group,” the blogger says. “Either no one noticed the subtle work she was doing, or no one wanted to give up their enjoyment to let her have a taste of it too.”

It all goes back to the “invisible labor” many moms take on for their family. This idea was the focus of a recent study, which found nearly all moms surveyed were responsible for organizing their family’s many schedules and managing the household chores. All this takes a toll on their happiness and can lead to an overwhelming feeling of emptiness. With that in mind, it’s not too surprising to hear the majority of dads are happier than moms.

“And people wonder why postpartum depression, rage and resentment are a common part of modern motherhood,” Ferner comments.

As the saying goes, it takes a village. Always remember to check in on your mom friends and support and encourage each other every opportunity you get. It may seem like someone is fine on the outside, but you never know what inner demons they’re working to keep at bay. In fact, most moms sadly feel like they have to hide their depression and anxiety from others, a 2018 study revealed.

Remember, a smile, commiserating shrug or even a little friendly banter can go a long way to a mom who feels alone.

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