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"Holy Crap — I'm a Mom!"

Whether it was baby’s first kick or the first time your boobs leaked in public, there’s a point in every mom’s life when the world as you know it ends and you realize — Whoa, I'm someone's mom now. Some of our favorite mommy bloggers revealed what their aha moments were. They range from heartwarming to completely hilarious.
ByShannon Guyton
Contributing Writer
Updated
March 2, 2017
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“I knew I was a mom when I was pregnant enough to notice that I could no longer see my own vagina.”

_— __Leah Segedie, founder of Mamavation _

“I knew I was a mom when I settled down to watch the Oscars, baby asleep and bottle of wine by my side, and realized within 4 seconds of the opening number that I hadn’t seen a single nominated film that year.

— Liz Gumbinner, Editor-in-Chief Cool Mom Picks and author of  Mom-101

“I remember the first time I left my newborn at home to go run errands by myself. When I came back, I was shocked to hear a baby crying in my house. Then I remembered, ‘Oh yeah, I’m a mom now!’.”

“I realized I was a parent when I was okay with being vomited on by someone who wasn’t drunk.”

_— __Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir and author of The Bloggess _

“I realized I was a mom when one of my son’s little friends toddled up to me and said, ‘Colin’s mommy!’ I suddenly realized that this is how the people in his world will forever see me.”

_— __Jessica Collins Grimes, author of Keeping Mommy Sane _

"The biggest surprise I had when I became a parent is how much free time I had before…. I always thought I was so busy.”

_— __Marissa Kraxberger, Vice President of Creative at Oscar de la Renta and author of George&Ruby _

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“I knew I was a mom the moment my infant rolled off the bed. I heard a loud thud followed by an unbelievable wail. It only took a second, but it felt like an eternity. The guilt set in immediately. Scooping up my baby boy to console him was a moment that cemented my feelings on motherhood. What I realized was that whatever emotions or guilt you feel are trumped by the unmitigated love you feel for your baby. You will both be okay. Better than okay.”

_— Alicia Ybarbo, Co-Author, “Sh*tty Mom:  The Parenting Guide for the Rest of Us”, shttymom.com** , @shttymom @aliciaybarbo @todaysmoms  **

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“I knew I was a mom when my daughter came out of my belly covered in that nasty cheese-like substance. Holy crap, I looked down at that goopy, swollen alien and I thought she was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid my eyes on. I mean, I had a difficult c-section so I was on like tons of trippy drugs, but even if I were sober I’m pretty sure I still would have thought she was gorgeous. Only a mother could feel that way.”

— Karen Alpert, Baby Sideburns

“After yet another sleepless night, I breastfed my newborn daughter and proceeded to sleepwalk my way with her back to her crib. As I was about to walk back into her room, I accidentally bumped the top of her head on the doorframe and I nearly had a heart attack. She had just fallen back to sleep and didn’t wake up when it happened. I raced back with her in my arms and woke my husband and he ran into the bathroom, grabbed a wash cloth and proceeded to wipe her face with cold water. In a matter of seconds, she woke up wailing. After that experience , I was never so happy to hear my baby cry in my life. Incidentally, she’s now 14 years old and for the record, I never did bump her head on a doorframe ever again.”

— Beth Feldman, Role Mommy

“I knew I was a mother when my husband, son and I got to the lobby of the hospital, and the nurse turned around and went back inside, and we were left alone to handle this little squishy bundle on our own. My husband and I looked at each other like “What do we do now?!” And in that moment I knew that we would figure it out, somehow.

— Amy Oztan, Selfish Mom

“I am surrounded by males in my house. With a husband, two sons, and a male dog, there are all kinds of smells. The favorite of theirs, of course, is the kind of smell that seeps from their rear ends. I knew that there would never be denying I had slipped into full-on Mom mode again when one child farted, blamed the other- and my automatic response was to sniff the air and say “nope, you’re lying!” because I could tell the smells of their farts apart.”

— Jenny Schoberl, Holdin’ Holden

“My daughter was born two months early, right as the middle school musical I was directing was about to open at the school where I taught English. The show was postponed while I recovered from her unexpected delivery and while my daughter became healthy enough to join me at rehearsals. When I pushed her stroller into that cafeteria and saw those 75 faces turn and look at me differently, I felt a wave of protectiveness and pride over my daughter swell inside me. That’s when I knew I was a mom.”

_— Amy Lupold Bair, Resourceful Mommy _

“When my twins were newborns, I was breastfeeding around the clock. At one point, the doorbell rang and I went to answer it. The superintendnt, coming to fix the sink, looked stunned when he saw me. Since one of the babies always seemed to need to breastfeed, I’d pretty much given up on buttoning up my shirt, even when I’d answered the door!”

— Nancy Friedman, co-founder of KidzVuz.com, founder of From Hip to Housewife.com

“I knew I was a mom when my youngest came into the bathroom to poop while I was relaxing in the bath. The other two bathrooms in the house were open. But apparently I needed to smell it. Must be true love.”

Angela,   Mommy PR

“I knew I was a mom when I had to use my Burberry scarf that I spent almost an entire paycheck on as a vomit catcher for my infant daughter. When she was finished, she didn’t have one ounce of puke on her own clothes, yet I was covered. She then turned to me, smiled and said, ‘I feel much better now.’ It was then that I realized that my days of Burberry were on hold, and vomit covered outfits were my new fashion trend.”

Danielle Herzog,   Martinis and Minivans

 

“I knew I was a mom when I started to sound just like _my _mom."

_— Mary Ann Zoellner, Co-Author, “Sh*tty Mom: The Parenting Guide for the Rest of Us”, shttymom.com** , **@shttymom @aliciaybarbo @todaysmoms

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