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Elena Donovan Mauer

One Dad-to-Be On What Surprised Him The Most About Pregnancy

Dad-to-be Scott, an online producer, had quite a few surprises during wife Shazmin’s pregnancy. (She’s due in July!) He learned what’s worth meticulous planning and when it’s best to go with the flow.

Scott, Larchmont, New York

I wish I knew…that morning sickness is not just for mornings—and it can be really bad.

No one warned me that morning sickness was really morning, noon and night sickness. My wife, Shazmin, had a very severe case of it. (You can read her side of the story here.) There really wasn’t much I could do, and it was horrible seeing her so sick all day long. I didn’t realize that it would be so hard for her.

I wish I knew…that teamwork is important early on.

I think our relationship actually strengthened as we prepared for our baby. I learned there are some things you just simply can’t control. Through it all, I just tried to be my wife’s biggest fan.

I wish I knew…that there’s a massive amount of planning involved.

Going into us trying to get pregnant, I expected having a baby to be a lot of work. Shazmin and I tend to do a lot of planning and organizing ahead of time. We’ve been busy. So far, I feel like we—and by “we” I mean 98 percent Shazmin—have done a great job handling the preparation.

I wish I knew…that at times, you just have to go with the flow.

Originally, I figured I would read everything and spend hours researching the best ways to prepare for being in the delivery room with my wife, but now I’m feeling like there really is no perfect way to prepare. We’re going to take a birthing class, which I think will be a big help. I’m very nervous but also just very excited. I can’t wait.

I wish I knew…that a baby needs a lot of stuff…and Mommy needs a “push present.”

Shazmin is in charge of the baby registry. But she tells me I need to get her a push present, so I’ve got that.

I wish I knew…that you can never feel completely financially ready.

We didn’t start trying to get pregnant until we felt like we were in a good enough place financially. We have been budgeting pretty strictly since getting pregnant and will continue to try to budget as much as possible. I feel like we have done a really good job of saving up money, watching our spending and being as prepared as we can financially.

I wish I knew…that I’d go gaga over onesies.

I’m excited to meet my baby boy! I can’t wait to start our family. And to be honest, I’m getting excited about the cute baby onesies. But seriously, I’m nervous about all the responsibility that is barreling toward me. It's a lot of responsibility.