CircleBumpCheckedFilledMedicalBookmarkBookmarkTickBookmarkAddCheckBoxCheckBoxFilled

Things You Never Thought You’d Say, but Do

We know there are some things you thought you wouldn’t ever be caught saying, but now that you’re a mom, you just can’t hold back. Bumpies share the unbelievable things that have come out of their mouths. What have you caught yourself saying?
save article
profile picture of Sarah Yang
Updated March 2, 2017
Hero Image
Image: Unknown Credit

“Poop is a very common conversation topic.” — Sierra S.

“No, I don’t want those free tickets to the game. I’m too tired and bloated.” —_ Stephanie S._

“I never thought I would say, ‘Because I said so,’ but now that my daughter is five years old and in the ‘Why?’ stage, I say it all the time.” — Lynette H.

“‘No, I’d rather go to bed’ — which pertains to many different things.” — Amy B.

“I’ve caught myself saying, ‘That’s not nice!’ to a driver who cut me off. In my pre-kids days I would have had a few choice other words.” — Dannielle B.

“Ahh, he just peed in my mouth!” — Amber M.

“My favorite comebacks are ‘That wasn’t an option’ and ‘Yeah? But what did I say?’ Emphasis on the ‘I.’
 — Ashley T.

“My husband and I always say we never thought we would be excited for poops and burps. Now we are.” — Elizabeth B.

“I say ‘Go find Da-da’ a lot — usually when I’m trying to cook to keep him out of the kitchen, but sometimes when I want to go to the bathroom alone.” — Lisa B.

“I call feet ‘tootsies’ and snacks ‘num nums.’” — Shantelle M.

“I say, ‘Just wait, one day you’ll have a kid just like you,’ to my three-year-old son all the time. My mom said it to me until he was born — now I understand and appreciate her more!” — Michelle S.

“No, don’t stick your finger up Momma’s nose.” — _Olivia S. _

“My dad’s common quote is: ‘You can never have anything nice with kids.’ Now it’s my own!” — Stacy D.

Related Video

“I find myself singing lullabies even when I’m by myself. I don’t even realize I’m doing it.” — Antioinette V.

“My favorite one is, ‘Do you need to go potty?’ My kids hate having to stop what they are doing just to go potty.” — Lisa R.

“‘Leave the cat alone’ or ‘Go clean your room or your toys are going out with the trash.’” — Anne M.

“‘Put the dog poop down!’” My toddler daughter just had to put everything in her mouth! Ew!” – Shannon G.

Plus more from The Bump:

save article
ADVERTISEMENT

Next on Your Reading List

funny tiktok video of dad gentle parenting
One Dad's "Gentle Parenting With Malicious Intent" TikTok Goes Viral
By Wyndi Kappes
costumed creepy easter bunny
15 Hilarious Photo Fails of Kids Meeting the Easter Bunny
By Ashlee Neuman
close up of lit candles on a birthday cake
Mom Hilariously Opens Up About Celebrating Son’s Birthday on the Wrong Day
By Nehal Aggarwal
ADVERTISEMENT
This Reddit Thread Is Celebrating Moms and All Their #MomFail Moments
This Reddit Thread Is Celebrating Moms and All Their #MomFail Moments
By Nehal Aggarwal
Annoying Things Almost All Parents Say
Annoying Things Almost All Parents Say
By Elena Donovan Mauer
20 slides
20 Funny Baby Onesies for Future Jokesters
20 Funny Baby Onesies for Future Jokesters
By Emily Platt
you're mom illustrated humorous book cover
Liz Climo’s New Picture Book for Adults Is the Content Parents Need
By Nehal Aggarwal
ADVERTISEMENT
amy schumer with her bay son and husband walking in the park
The Hilarious Reason Amy Schumer Changed Her Son's Name
By Nehal Aggarwal
celebrity chrissy teigen
Chrissy Teigen Just Wants a Few Minutes Alone and Every Mom Can Relate
By Nehal Aggarwal
amy schumer walks in rainy city street
Amy Schumer Shares Hilarious Parenting Hack on Her YouTube Channel
By Nehal Aggarwal
ADVERTISEMENT
babies dressed up for valentines day in a chocolate heart box
Babies Dressed as Valentine’s Day Chocolates Are Too Cute to Handle
By Nehal Aggarwal
parents nap on couch at newborn shoot
Exhausted Parents Adorably Fall Asleep During Baby’s Photoshoot
By Nehal Aggarwal
Happy baby wearing a onesie thats "born awesome."
25 Reasons Babies Rock
By Lissa Poirot and Sarah Yang
ADVERTISEMENT
elf on the shelf fails
The Funniest Elf on the Shelf Fails of the Season
By Christin Perry
chrissy teigen holding her toddler daughter
Chrissy Teigen Says No One Takes Photos of Her and Moms Can Relate
By Nehal Aggarwal
toddler holds envelope addressed to santa
18 Kids Who Wrote the Cutest Letters to Santa
By Holly Pevzner
baby monitor with red filter
Scary Baby Monitor Image Is Going Viral and the Comments Are Hilarious
By Nehal Aggarwal
ADVERTISEMENT
little girl sitting on steps with pumpkins
Moms Are Carving Pumpkins to Replicate “Mom Life”—and It’s Hilarious
By Nehal Aggarwal
Barbie's Malibu Dreamhouse available to rent on Airbnb
You Can Stay at Barbie’s Malibu Dreamhouse—for Only $60 a Night
By Nehal Aggarwal
dad laughing and watching tv while holding baby
Watch This Toddler Hilariously Interrupt His Mom’s Live TV Segment
By Nehal Aggarwal
ADVERTISEMENT
Article removed.
Article removed.
Name added. View Your List