Au Pair Vs Nanny: Which Caregiver Is Right for Your Family?

As a parent, it’s impossible to do it all, 100 percent of the time. As a full-time work-from-home mom of two, I’ve been reminded of this truth over the years. The good news is that there are some pretty solid childcare options out there to help you in your journey. You’ve got day care, au pairs and nannies to choose from. If you specifically want someone to watch your children in your home, you may be weighing the pros and cons of an au pair vs. nanny. But exactly what is an au pair—and how is their role different from that of a typical childcare provider? More importantly, which is a better match for your family? Read on to get insights from childcare providers and real parents.

What Is an Au Pair?

For starters, an au pair serves as a live-in caregiver. Typically, they are from a different country and live with a host family for a year or longer while helping to take care of the family’s child or children, explains Blanka Molnar, a former au pair, conscious parenting coach and founder at Awarenest. In exchange for their help, the family typically covers an au pair’s living expenses and provides a regular allowance.

Au Pair vs. Nanny: What’s the Difference?

At a quick glance, nannies are full-time workers who are often older and have more child care experience than an au pair. Au Pairs, on the other hand, are usually younger and live with a host family. Here are some other key differences.

Cost

If you need full-time help, hiring an au pair is generally more cost-effective. Expenses vary by program and situation, but “even when factoring in agency fees and the added cost of providing room and board, an au pair typically costs less in the long run than employing a nanny,” says Molnar. You’ll also need to facilitate and pay for the enrollment in required educational programs. That said, nannies often charge by the hour, which can add up pretty quickly if you’re looking for more full-time help.

Length of service

You’ll find that au pairs usually have a limit on their stay due to visa requirements. So their length of service averages about one to two years. On the other hand, the length of a nanny’s employment is driven closer by the needs of the family and the age of children. “Experienced nannies who begin with families with young children usually stay for three to five years. Alternatively, a family could need just a summer nanny, which would be a three-month tenure,” says Laura Davis, a nanny concierge and franchise owner of Jovie, a company that connects families with nannies and sitters.

Experience

Most au pairs are students or younger adults who are either taking a gap year or want to see more of the world while having a roof over their head and meals covered, explains Molnar. It’s a great bridge into their next career jump but they typically don’t have a lot of childcare experience.

Additionally, per the U.S. Department of State an pair can’t be placed with families that:

• Have a baby under 3 months, unless a parent or adult caregiver will be there.
• Have children under 2 years of age, unless they have at least 200 hours of documented infant childcare experience.
• Have a special needs child, unless the au pair has prior experience

On the other hand, nannies typically have more hands-on experience. “Nannies often come from the preschool teacher world, have experience as newborn care specialists or have years of in-home nannying for a variety of families,” Davis says.

Responsibilities

It really depends on the family’s needs. For a nanny or au pair, tasks can be negotiated and agreed upon before services start. Usually, au pair agency sets guidelines and regulations to keep au pair tasks centered around childcare duties, like cleaning up after the kids, cooking for them and driving them to and from school or activities. Davis explains that nannies are more of the typical employee type, where tasks are listed out and decided on at the time of hire, sometimes expanding into a range of other household needs.

Hours and schedule

Agency regulations will dictate an au pair’s number of hours, which usually comes with a limit, says Davis. For example, one of the largest agencies in the United States, Au Pair in America, caps an au pair’s working hours at a maximum of 10 hours per day and 45 per week. On top of that, they get about one full day off each week and one full weekend off a month. Nannies are on more of a typical work schedule, often working 8 to 10 hours a day, Monday through Friday. Of course, if you have different needs, you can work that out with your nanny upon hire and come up with a specific schedule.

Qualifications

An au pair hired within an agency goes through a selection and matching process. This is based on the agency’s requirements and the family’s expectations, like hours of caretaking experience, language, status of driver’s license and education, says Molnar. Nannies usually have more childcare experience and qualifications as they’re generally older and taking care of children is their chosen profession. The selection process for nannies isn’t as restricted and regimented. “This, again, is a case-by-case scenario. The best caregiver for a family is the individual with the experience, training, background and personality to be a good fit with the family. Truly, that can come from either a nanny or an au pair,” adds Davis.

Age

Most nannies are older than au pairs, and choose nannying as a full-time career, says Molnar. You’ll find that au pairs are younger, often college-aged students, about 18 to 26 years old.

Cultural opportunity

Since au pairs come from different countries, families who use an au pair agency get the chance to learn about different cultures.

Living arrangements

Au pairs always live with the family where they work, says Molnar. Au pairs need to have their own room and access to a bathroom. Sometimes nannies can be live-in too, depending on the family’s needs, but this is not as commonplace. “There are also rotational nannies, who work seven days on and seven days off. They may live in when their seven days are in service, and live off-site during their seven days off,” says Davis.

How to Determine Whether a Nanny or Au Pair Is Better for Your Family

Choosing between an au pair vs. nanny? It really boils down to your particular situation. Molnar suggests asking yourself these questions:

• How many hours of help do I need? An au pair is an excellent option if you need full-time, consistent family support. It’ll also usually be more cost-efficient compared to a full-time nanny. Nannies are great for more customization, with part-time or flexible hours.
• Do I have a private room available? This can be a deal-breaker as it’s one of the requirements from au pair agencies.
• Am I ready to welcome someone into my home and daily life? This is more of a sit and marinate kind of question, but it’s important nonetheless. Include the whole family in this discussion, and look at what an au pair and nanny would look like integrated into your daily routine. “An au pair becomes part of your household, so it’s essential to feel comfortable with that level of closeness and cultural exchange,” points out Molnar.
• Can I meet the criteria for hosting an au pair? Not just anyone can host an au pair. Families must meet certain requirements, like having a private bedroom available, providing three meals a day, offering study opportunities, being available for monthly meetings with an agency coordinator and any other detailed criteria the agency requires of you.
• What’s my financial comfort zone? Can you invest in a full-time nanny with higher hourly pay? Or is an au pair more in your financial range? Keep in mind that au pairs may cost less overall, but agency fees and living costs still need to be considered, says Molnar.

Bottom line—you need help. Davis says taking on an au pair is often more economical, but it comes with limitations of scope of work and the requirement of providing room and board. “However, with the right fit, an au pair can turn into a wonderful experience on both sides of the equation with lifetime connections.” Meanwhile, nannies can often bring more child development experience from their background, as it’s typically their career path. “Childcare for a family is a big decision,” says Davis. Guidance from an au pair agency or a professional nanny agency can help you make the call that’s right for you and your kiddos.