How This Family Makes the Holidays Work Post-Divorce
No matter how hard you may try to make things work between you and your partner, sometimes divorce is best for everyone’s well-being.
For social media personality Kristina Kuzmic and her ex-husband, that was definitely the case. In a Thanksgiving Facebook post, the mom explains how the holidays have changed since she and her husband have split, and how, in many ways, they’ve stayed the same.
This Thanksgiving, like many, was spent at her in-laws’ house with her ex-husband, husband and kids. And while they are all able to celebrate the holidays in harmony, it took hard work and commitment to get there.
“My ex-husband’s parents obviously weren’t thrilled about me divorcing their son. Soon after the divorce, I drove to my in-laws’ house and had a very long and open and difficult and awkward and beautiful and complicated conversation with them,” she admits.
“In the end, everyone was in agreeance on one thing: The kids come first.”
“We decided not to point fingers or blame or judge. We just talked about the most important thing: the kids,” she recounts. “We decided to put our differences and our pride aside and focus on what really matters: family, forgiveness, love.”
And years after their divorce, they’ve stayed true to their word.
“Today was another Thanksgiving spent at [my in-laws’] house. I’ve always been welcome. Once I started dating my current husband, I assumed the invitation to Thanksgiving would stop. But no, the invitation was extended to him as well. It’s been like this for years now, all of us getting together for the holidays,” she explains.
So every Thanksgiving, they sit around a table full of savory dishes and eat together like “one big family.”
“None of this divorce, remarriage, co-parenting stuff is easy. In some ways, it’s the hardest part of my life,” Kuzmic admits. “But the hard work and our ‘kids first, egos last’ formula has been worth it. So, so worth it.”
Divorce is hard on parents and kids. The key is to reassure your little ones you still love them so much, and the split has nothing to do with them. Of course, not all exes can make their relationship after a split work quite like Kuzmic and her ex-husband, and that’s perfectly fine. What’s important is for you and your partner to make co-parenting a priority.