5 Hints Every Dad-to-Be Needs Before Buying a Push Present

If you’re an expectant dad, you’ve probably thought some about the contents of your hospital bag and the transport plan for when your partner delivers the “I think it’s time” line (which, by the way, is usually much less cinematic than the way it goes down on TV). You’ve prepped for the logistics and you have your breathing coach duties down, but be sure not to forget that icing on the cake—the push present.

Giving birth is the hardest, most sacred act on the planet, so don’t forget to shower mom with a little something to show her how proud you are of her and that you have you her back as you collaboratively embark on the journey of parenting. Sure, it’s only symbolic, but these things matter.

Here are five things not to forget when planning the perfect push present:

1. Remember It’s About the Woman, Not the Man. This one is most important. A new mom is a different person and it’s going to be all about baby from here on out. As the dad, it’s your job to remind her that before this little bundle entered your life, you were attracted to her as a woman. Make sure the gift is a reminder of the sexy, beautiful, smart, funny chica that she will always be to you.

2. Go for Timeliness. Don’t wait to get back to the house to give her the gift. Make sure you find a time to give it to her before you go home. Don’t shove a present in her face in the midst of her baby delivering, but when things quiet down a bit post delivery, collect yourself and make it happen. When you get it home, it’s officially parenting go time, so make sure the birth gift is set beforehand.

3. Wait Until You’re Alone. Following up on the last point, try and find some alone time when you give mom the gift. There’s going to be lots of friends, family and visitors around, but find a time when it’s just the two of you. Kick everyone out for 5 to 10 minutes. You don’t want to give a birth gift while trying to entertain an audience. You need to give yourself room to tell secrets, cry and be humble.

4. Shop for Something That Works for Right Now. Spa days and “coupons for chores” and all that stuff are great, but make sure your birth gift is something she can enjoy, wear or look at right now. In the hustle, bustle and emotion of new parenting, one of those “in the future” gifts can just get lost. Get her something that creates a moment right now.

5. The Card Matters! So Don’t Forget It. As guys, sometimes we’re not great with words on the live stage. Buy a card (preferably blank on the inside) and stick it in your hospital bag. Once baby has arrived, spend some time alone to fill in that card with a few words describing your emotions and your outlook for your new family. It will help to freeze the emotions in time as you guys get busy parenting.