Rihanna Shares Family Portrait and Her Unfiltered Takes on Motherhood

After years spent out of the spotlight, Rihanna is opening up about her new life as a mother.

In an intimate cover interview with British Vogue, the soon-to-be mom of two shares her unfiltered, and rather relatable, takes on motherhood so far. From the magic of those first few months with baby to her raw experiences with childbirth and postpartum life, the Super Bowl star performer gets real with fans about how her life has completely changed.

See some of her unfiltered takes on motherhood so far below.

On welcoming her son into the world…

In one of her first comments about her son’s birth, Rihanna describes the moment as “beautiful but also a surreal experience. “I cannot believe it,” she told British Vogue features director Giles Hattersley. “Essentially, from one person I became two. You walk into the hospital as a couple and leave as a family of three. It’s nuts.”

Echoing the common anxieties that come with leaving the hospital, the Anti album creator also mentioned feeling “so paranoid.” “Because you’re like: they trusted us to come home with this baby? This new life? With us?” she told Vogue. “No doctors, no nurses, we’re just… going home?”

On those first few months with her baby boy…

When asked about her first few months as a mom, the Fenty creator simply responded, “Oh, my God, it’s legendary. It’s everything. You really don’t remember life before, that’s the craziest thing ever,” she told British Vogue. “You literally try to remember it—and there are photos of my life before—but the feeling, the desires, the things that you enjoy, everything, you just don’t identify with it because you don’t even allow yourself mentally to get that far, because…” she continued, “Because it doesn’t matter.”

Rihanna also shared that her favorite time with her son happens in the mornings. “I remember in the beginning I used to roll his bassinet into the bathroom and be showering and like wiping the fog off [the glass] just to peep at him,” she told British Vogue. “Those were always my favorite, his little wake-up face, seeing his face change, seeing his color come in, just all of these changes.”

On the struggles of postpartum life…

Just like parents all over the world, Rihanna describes the first few days of parents as “insane,” according to British Vogue. ”You don’t sleep. At all. Not even if you wanted to. We came home, cold turkey, had no one. It was just us as parents and our baby. Man, you’re a zombie for the most part.” Thankfully months later she shared her baby boy is finally sleeping through the night.

One of the other hardest parts of her postpartum life? Dressing to impress. A style icon who revolutionized maternity wear, Rihanna told British Vogue that, “Dressing for pregnancy was such a piece of cake,” but when it comes to postpartum wear, it’s not so easy. “The week that I came home from the hospital–that was nothing but sweats and hoodies. But the weeks after that, you don’t know what to put on. Everything is too small or too big,” she noted. “You kind of just gotta wait it out otherwise you end up buying so many clothes you’re not going to use. Well, unless you get pregnant again.”

On raising a young Black man…

The nine-time Grammy-award-winning artist opened up to British Vogue about how “raising a young Black man is one of the scariest responsibilities in life.” The star discussed with the outlet how it’s made her change her view on everything. “You’re like, ‘What am I leaving my kids to? This is the planet they’re gonna be living on? All of those things really start to hit differently.”

Earlier this year, Rihanna also noted that the birth of her son had pushed her to take risks, like performing at the Super Bowl. “It’s this knowing that you can do anything,” she told British Vogue, “even things that seem the craziest, like, ‘I’m going to say yes to the Super Bowl in the middle of postpartum? What the heck am I thinking? But you’re geeked on a challenge like that because you know what your body just did. You feel this sense of ‘Nothing is impossible.’”

Rihanna shares even more about her life in the full British Vogue interview. The expectant mom talks about life as a working mom, her relationship with her partner A$AP Rocky and even a little about her return to music and possible upcoming album.

Fingers crossed for new music and more stunning maternity fashion!