Teach Your Kids to Be More Self-Sufficient With This Simple Change

As a parent—especially a mom—it can feel like your to-do list never ends. From making it to daycare drop-off on time to remembering every little item for visits to grandma’s house, there’s always something to prep, pack, or plan. That’s why raising a child who’s even a bit more self-sufficient can be a total game-changer. But self-sufficent kids don’t just spring up over night, they have to be taught along the way—and one mom suggests that training can start with something as small as their afternoon snack.

In a now-viral video mom Chelsea Jo (@sunny_acres_regen_farm) explains her slightly unorthodox and what might sound initially “a little crazy or a little crude” for helping her daughter become more self-sufficent.

“The other day we were driving in the car, and from the back seat [my 3-year-old daughter] calls up and she’s like ‘Mom! I’m hungry!’ … and so my response to her … was ‘Oh! Did you bring yourself a snack?’ “So this is my parenting technique,” she continues. “Same thing ‘Mom, I’m really thirsty!’ ‘Hmm! Did you bring your water bottle with you?’ I know, it sounds a little harsh. I promise, I’m not letting my kids go hungry; I’m not letting them go thirsty. They’re very hydrated, well-fed kids, all right? This is used in very specific scenarios.”

“But what this does is it puts a little bit of the responsibility and the ownership on them,” Chelsea notes. She goes on to explain that she’s been doing this with her older daughter on quick errands since she was old enough to understand what she was saying. This little by little check-in and natural consequences and teaching her a lesson about looking out for herself without necesaerilly being a punishment.

“The default is not that I am responsible for every single thing,” she concludes. “Yes, I’m responsible for keeping her healthy and hydrated, but for those extra things, she’s responsible and she knows it.”